The movie had cameos of pretty much every star from the 30s and 40s, still vying for relevance. Good ol' Chuck had to talk the world's most freaked-out stewardess through flying a plane. He kept calling her "honey" and "sweetie" and acting like breasts immediately mean you're an invalid. Of course, he finally just had to fly up to the airplane, climb in, and land the plane himself. While wearing a yellow turtleneck and saying "Dammit, man" several times. It was horrific and sexist and hilarious.
Sorry for the spoilers, but, well, it's a 40-year-old movie.
So, my enjoyment of "Airport 1975" caused me to DVR "The Poseidon Adventure." This seagoing disaster flick then sat on our DVR forever, until My Guy and I decided to watch it Saturday night.
You guys. This movie is AMAZING. It's the movie "Titanic" wishes it could be. It's the reason why I'm getting a life-sized tattoo of Gene Hackman on my back. "The Poseidon Adventure" is cinematic gold!
Basically, Leslie Nielson is the captain of The Poseidon, an old ocean liner on its last run. Some stuff happens, and the ship flips completely over - right after midnight on New Year's Eve, naturally.
This is bad.
But Gene Hackman is a hip minister who is questioning his faith. And he leads a small, rag-tag group of passengers on a so-crazy-it-just-might-work quest to escape The Poseidon. They are constantly outrunning water and explosions and terror.
You've got Ernest Borgnine. You've got Shelley Winters. You've got Red Buttons. You've got the cool grandpa from "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory." It's magic that keeps just a millimeter away from camp.
Here's why I like "The Poseidon Adventure:"
- Gene Hackman shows that you don't have to look like Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson to be a plausible action hero.
- The people in this movie actually take the time to be afraid and upset - you know, like normal humans.
- The song. Dear God, the song. It's been in my head for 3 days.
Here's the 1 thing I dislike about "The Poseidon Adventure:"
- This movie is not about an adventure. An adventure is going somewhere and doing some new stuff. Going on a cruise and then having only 6 people on the entire ship survive isn't an adventure - it's the cruise from hell. This movie should have been called, "Poseidon: Never Get on a Boat Again."
What's your favorite disaster flick?