Monday, June 1, 2009

Every day is Father's Day.

Guess who was just minding her own business, trying to be a responsible homeowner by throwing a little grass seed down in the bald spots of her front lawn? And guess who learned the hard way that there was a ginorous mud dauper nest inside her hose reel?

Sonofbitchshit.

Well, the blue mud daupers are really pretty. But a bit, umm, bitchy. I have four stings on my left bicep. Perhaps it will swell up and I will look really buff. But right now? Right now, I'm stoned out of my mind on Benadryl. I'm sort of allergic to wasps.

Strangely, these stings didn't hurt the way I remember other stings to hurt. Perhaps I have passed my Delicate Young Flower stage and am now officially a Tough Old Broad.

The wasps made me think of my sweet daddy. When Poochie and I were growing up, we had one of those metal swing sets. Ours was white with orange and green accents (of course - the official color scheme of the 70s).

The problem with this particular swing set design was that the hollow tubes made the most awesome wasp condos ever. And no kid is particularly pumped about swing sets with the added bonus of painful stings.

So, every year, my dad would get his can of Raid and spray the crap out of that swing set. My mom, Poochie and I would stand at the sliding glass door and watch him spray Raid into one end of the main swing set support ... and watch a hot mess of pissed-off wasps come flying out the other end. Then, we'd cheer as my dad ran like holy hell for the house, wasps hot on his tail.

It's one of those things that I thought was really cool as a kid. As an adult, I know how completely distasteful that task is and have a totally new appreciation for my dad.

5 comments:

Dorrie said...

Yeah! Dads are great like that!!!

Hope you are feeling better soon. Those wasp stings can be nasty. Hope you made them pay for hurting you. I am sure your Dad would be proud.

LaDue & Crew said...

OMG!! I'd be a total wimp- make my hubby take a day off work to cater to my every whine after that! You ARE a tough broad (notice, I did not say "old")!

Well thank God it wasn't Killer ass bee's!!

Gretchen said...

Memories! Since I practially grew up at the lake, my memories are mud dobbers in the mast/boom. Don't be up there when we raised the sail because the nest would fall out all over you and my hero Dad would also be armed with the can of Raid. Love it!

Andi said...

Thanks. Now I can add "garden hose" to the list of things I will not use around my house.

Sonofbitchshit indeed.

SCREAMING FOR CHOCOLATE said...

I read that putting a copper penny on the sting, taping it down, that it will really make it better fast. I have heard that in an hour or so it is all but gone.

Fortunately I haven't been stung since I read this but maybe if there is a next time you should give it a go.