I was recently asked to serve on a the board of a nonprofit. The organization is cool, but the board? Cats in need of herding and Ritalin. I declined.
I kind of decided to stop doing stuff I don't like to do.
A pal and I joked that if I don't return your calls, you know you didn't make the cut. But really, it's part of my larger effort to do what is right for me instead of what I think is expected of me. Because the list of what I think is expected of me is usually about 80% fabricated in my brain, anyway.
I hate going to meetings and find them generally unproductive, so I resigned from 2 boards. No fuss, no muss.
Now, I didn't just say, "I hate these meetings. Fuck you guys." I kind of wish I had. But I said I didn't have time anymore - which is true. I don't have time to waste on stuff I don't like. Folks were sad-ish to see me go, but nobody threw themselves in front of a bus in protest. If we're being honest, that was a bit of a disappointment.
My inner go-getter, who is absolutely mortified that I have days when my biggest accomplishment is emptying the dishwasher? Well, that bitch is a little uptight about my lack of civic involvement. She has a clipboard bearing lists of all the things I'm supposed to do, and she follows me around. She pelts me with questions like, "What about networking? How will you ever meet people? You're turning into a looooooser!"
My inner go-getter still hasn't gotten over my departure from Corporate America. We're working through it. Well, I'm over it, lounging in my yoga pants and having cake for lunch. She's straightening her pantyhose and retouching her lipstick, preparing for battle.
I'm not really bipolar. I'm just adjusting to new expectations: my own.
What do you want to stop doing? What's stopping you from stopping?