Wednesday, March 24, 2010

In which I am judgmental and catty.

I'm helping host a baby shower for Alice. My job is the invites and RSVPs.

It's a whole new world.

First of all, did you know that you can order baby shower invites with a silhouette of a pregnant belly ... a silhouette into which you then insert your own ultrasound photo?

In keeping with the title of this post: are you freaking kidding me? Nothing gets me psyched about gathering newborn essentials like a picture of E.T.

Secondly ... I've had two invitees ask if they can bring their young children.

Oh, sweet eight-pound, six-ounce baby Jesus in your golden fleece diaper.

I know I sound like the old spinster biddy I really and truly am when I say this, but ... any invitation you receive is generally limited to the people listed on the envelope. When I receive an invitation addressed to Cha Cha, I somehow know instinctively that this does not also mean that I am to bring Foxie Doxie, Lil' Frankfurter, my cousin, and that guy pumping gas next to me at Quik Trip.

How is it that I know this and other people don't seem to? I'm really not that smart. If I can grasp this concept, you can, too!

And as for the woman who e-mailed and asked if she should get a babysitter?

I love kids. I do. And I understand that last-minute stuff comes up and sometimes bringing your kidlet can't be helped. And newborns? Everybody loves a good round of Pass The Baby.

But.

If you ever find yourself asking if you should get a babysitter, the answer is always, invariably, yes. A thousand times, yes. For the love of all that is holy, yes.

Ahem.

Krampus is a gentleman of style and panache. He understands the etiquette of the invite.

Here, he was invited to visit my elementary school, which is now an apartment building for seniors.
Evidently, Krampus was also invited to ride the OATS bus.
Rock on, Krampus. Rock on.

13 comments:

sherilee said...

Man, that frog gets around.

Judge and cat away, Cha-Cha. I knew when I read the blog header I was in for a treat and sure enough! You are spot on. Happy shower-throwing. Wedding or baby, they always seem fraught with craziness.

Wait til you're supposed to come up with games. Nothing annoys me more than 4-hour showers where games are a central theme. And there are some really lame ones for baby showers too, don't get me started on chocolate bars and diapers.

Good luck with that!

drawer queen said...

Baby showers...ugh.

I am guessing your Mom is getting quite the reputation around town as the crazy woman with the stuffed frog!

Cyndi B. said...

Damn, that frog has a better social life than I do.

You go right ahead and judge. I am always amazed at how utterly clueless people can be when it comes to invitations. The one that gets me is the person (or persons!) who RSVPs and then doesn't show up. Especially when they've said they'll bring something!!

And people wonder why I don't get more involved...

mel said...

I'm seriously jealous of Krampus and his around the town minglings.

Erm, no, you're kid isn't invited. Duh. Although, I did take the baby with me to a shower a few weekends ago, but the bride-to-be personally asked me to include her. That's different.

People really just don't get it. And you shouldn't be forced to be the bad guy. It's about your friend and celebrating her own baby. Argh. And, yeah, ultrasound invites...please count me out.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

How are people SO dense? I ALWAYS presume my kids aren't included. Sheesh. I can barely stand them myself! (kidding. kind of...) I didn't even want kids at my WEDDING. Imagine how well that went down!
Hold the line. And the focal point is the mother-to-be, not the mothers-who've-been.

Iron Needles said...

'an elementary school that is now an apartment building for seniors...'

I appreciate all the cattiness. (Rilly! I do...) but I cannot get out of my mind the seniors using the restrooms with the little shorty commodes!

A piece of news said...

Krampus is the man.

I do not like baby showers. Good luck getting RSVPs, you always have to call people who assumed you knew they aren't coming/will be there.

And few people more self involved than a pregnant woman. Perhaps that is as it should be, but ultrasound pictures show up even on FB. I find it jarring.

hope505 said...

"... Everybody loves a good round of Pass The Baby. .." *haha!* so true! We use a timer and the "you-drop-you-drink" rule! And every time the baby makes it all the way around, we all drink!
* ; )

Banjo @ Unfabulousness said...

I am feeling the ugly green eyed monster rear it's head because Krampus gets to take all these fieldtrips and I am stuck here, at work......

You hit the nail on the had here ChaCha. If we wanted to have a playdate with the children that's what the invitation would say. Leave them at home. Those moms might be surprised to find that adult conversation can be fun!

Mary @ Giving Up On Perfect said...

Why do I feel like Krampus is living a life most of us have only dreamed of?

Anyway. I completely, totally and redundantly agree with you on the no babies at the baby shower thing. Amen.

Gretchen said...

Here's a new one, RSVPing via blog comment! Of course I will be there, but your handy invitation is all the way upstairs and thinking about it now (after reading) I hope this works!

BTW, I will be there kid free!!! 100% agree with you on this one!!!!!

jenn said...

I've never been a fan of baby showers - even the ones thrown for me. That said, the one dependable thing about them should be that (a) the food is great, and (b) no kids except the one in utero. I'm with you - if the name's not on the invitation, take a hint.

Janet said...

I agree, the ultrasound photos inside a belly sound kind of creepy. And amen to, "if you're questioning whether you should get a sitter, the answer is yes!"