Tonight I looked up at the clear sky and was surprised to see a bright, full moon. That means it's been four weeks since Mr. Wonderful and I were on a walk and stopped in our tracks, faced with a huge harvest moon.
I knew he was going to end our relationship and felt helpless to stop him. As we watched the moon rise, he put his hand on my shoulder and I thought, "Don't. Don't touch me. Don't make it harder."
And now I am so very, very tired, like all of the worry and fret and sadness and want of the last several months is finally catching up with me. But I'm finding joy.
A dear friend gave me a book by Brian Andreas, a wonderful artist and poet. These lines resonated with me:
There are days
I drop words
of comfort on
myself like
falling
leaves
& remember
that it is
enough to be
taken care of
by my self.
So I'm going to go to bed and will be funny again tomorrow.
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9 comments:
You are getting there... You are worth more than he could ever be to you. Keep the faith, girl!
I like the dog poo escapades! Makes me feel not so bad when my dog (well, one of my 3)eats socks and windex bottles. We have a lotta interesting dog poo around here.
Full moons are part of the ebb and flow - so is heart ache unfortunately, part of the flow of life. You'll be under that big full moon with a real keeper someday, sooner than you think, with more love and happiness than you are letting yourself imagine - quite possibly more than you've ever felt before. Look forward to it and it will happen for you!
Marsha
don't worry about being funny or being not funny. just worry about getting past this.
you'll get there.
we all do
and you know what? once you're past---you'll be funny again. you'll even be able to be funny about all this.
That is a gorgeous sentiment.
The fact that you can write about DOG POO means you haven't lost your sense of humor
what wonderful words. you keep taking care of yourself ok?
I'll be stopping by so I can keep an eye on you:>)
I'm going to tell you what I just told my patient yesterday,"Don't you let some man keep you down in the bed feeling worthless. You've got to get yourself up, girl." That is the definition of strength and you've got it there in your backbone and your chocolate covered graham crackers. Do whatever it takes to keep standing. with love from been there/done that.
PS. Love dog poo stories. Better to read them than to clean them...
Lovely poem. Thanks for sharing.
Reading it again.
I really like it.
Tomorrow, then. See you then.
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